PRETENTIOUS POETRY – “Back in Black”
Welcome to PRETENTIOUS POETRY – where we take a look at classic rock lyrics as paraphrased by a sophomore English major. Today’s installment is the AC/DC classic “Back in Black”. Brace yourself for true idiocy.
RETURNED IN SABLE
Returned in sable, away to bed
Protracted absence, joyous upon return
Correct – I’ve become unrestrained from the antiquated execution device
That bound me to this place
The heavens I simply regard
Owing to the fact that they alter my consciousness
Disregard the funeral coach, as I shan’t perish
I am capable of eight resurrections
Feline vision
I will require each; as I am unbridled in my Dionysian revels
Inasmuch as I am once again present
Affirmative, I have returned
Indeed, here I stand
Aye, I am no longer away
Verily I am returned in sable
Without question I am returned in sable
Supine as the rear passenger of a prestigious, luxury automobile
Atop the album sales charts and rising
I am a vessel of potency
It’s true that I am simultaneously involved in intimate relations with multiple partners
In order to be harmed, I must first be seized
The path I have chosen allows me to avoid both my enemies and police officers
None shall again indict me for criminal behavior
Gaze upon me at this moment as I achieve my goals
Do not tempt fate, steer well clear of me
Inasmuch as I am once again present
Affirmative, I have returned
Indeed, here I stand
Aye, I am no longer away
Verily I am returned in sable
Without question I am returned in sable
BRILLIANT!!!
😎😂